Wednesday, November 19, 2003

BETTER LATE TO THE GOOGLE-TROLLING PARTY THAN NEVER: There appear to be two dominant attitudes toward Paris Hilton right now: (1) She is an insufferable fame-whore who is getting what she deserves; or (2) geez, she’s hot, where can I get the video?

I, on the other hand, fall squarely into Camp 3 (or maybe Camp 2A). Really, how can you not love Paris Hilton (and while I’m on the topic, why isn’t Paris Hilton a gay icon)? Like Robert Evans, Dan Abrams, and Medea Benjamin, everything about Paris Hilton screams: F*ck off – it’s who I am. In fact, I like to think of PH as the pure embodiment of a single concept. What Tinkerbell is to innocent fantasy and Tyler Durden to festering male aggression, so she is to the uncompromising pursuit of fleeting pleasure.

Which is exactly why I find this whole sex tape thing depressing. It’s tough to be the poster-child for unremittingly luxuriant sybarism when you’re suing and getting sued, not to mention getting caught on tape with Shannon Doherty’s sleazy ex, really not to mention willingly getting caught on tape with him. (By the way, do Solomon and Steve Bing pay dues to the same club? Just wondering.)

Anyway, if you’re like me, you would feel just a bit too weird watching the video but were happy to read the transcript, particularly this line: "TV: Call me Steve! PH: (Quick slurp)."

Oh, yeah, still way excited for the Simple Life, especially since the Nicole Richie heroin bust.

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