Friday, February 25, 2005

NOT COMING SOON TO A THEATRE ANYWHERE: You have discovered Query Letters I Love, right? As a person who has, on a few occaisions, attempted to take a crack at writing a screenplay or a novel, reading the ideas here makes me feel much better about myself--I mean, I can't imagine what leads you to come up with an idea like: "A neurotic in 1880s Russia tries to deal with his inferiority complex by challenging a hated classmate to a duel and playing mind-games with a sweet young whore." Then again the pitch, "Unhappily-engaged-to-the-wrong man LUCY has a bad day at the diner then scurries down the icy street carrying Christmas packages, before losing her footing and banging her head--hard--against the curb. Meanwhile, little CARMELA asks Santa for a new mommy, and her single, lonely dad WILLIAM is sorry he can't deliver... Yet, when they awaken on Christmas morning, the Kinkaids find Lucy on their sofa" could actually be an ABC Family movie, which would air immediately after "3 Days,"a movie which my sister inexplicably loves.

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